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Showing posts from January, 2014

Complete power in weakness.

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Then he said to me, "my grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness" 2 Corinthians 12:9     You know that feeling deep in your gut when you're having a nightmare and you're running, fighting, or even hiding for your life?  Then you wake up and you are really relieved to know there is life outside of that nightmare? That's the type of desperation and relief I've felt lately. A desperation that knows I'm so close and susceptible to falling into Satan's trap and yet a relief in knowing I can cling to a life sheltered in the wings of my Protector. I've gotten some really encouraging feedback about the example of  strength  I've shown   with everything; ironically, I want you to know that being weak has really been what has helped me most--its driven me to places I've never been.   In weakness, I've come to understand that I am no better than anyone else -- even those who have directly hurt me .  I am capabl

6 in 1; a tribute to my roomies.

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It's always better when we're together   Can I be real? I was not thrilled at the thought of moving from my own apartment into a one bedroom apartment with 4 (now 5) other girls. Now I can't see myself belonging anywhere else.   God knows exactly what you need, seriously.   Allow me to introduce you to my roomies:                                                                                                                                                        First there is Sharmayne: She is driven and hardworking, yet underneath it all she still has a youth filled heart that nearly makes it impossible to be upset with in any manner. While she's great at being a friend on the spot, she also knows how to dig deep into the heart. I'ts been fun watching her learn about her emotions and the areas she's fought to be transformed in. Her heart has taught me what it looks like to follow a leader with complete loyalty, trust and imitation. Her f

Is it enough?

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  Something I've realized since I've been separated is that nothing is guaranteed.   For the past six years, I dreamed that one day I would go into the ministry, get married, have an amazing family of my own, live out of the country at some point, and grow old as couple recalling the many ways God worked in my life with gratitude. And while all those are great aspirations, they are based off of an assumption of what  'life to the full ' looks like. As a disciple, I can misplace my hope; I confuse God's promises and replace them with my own expectations. danger!   When I was asked to become a full-time intern and moved to San Jose, my heart got excited to check-off a dream answered. Then when I got engaged, I thought another dream achieved.  As much as God would soon expose sin in the relationship, he wanted to expose my own heart. I quickly realized that in my own heart I needed to check where my hope was --was it in the things God gives me or in the cross h

When things don't make sense, it's okay.

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So, it's a new year.. (side note: I feel silly having a blog again, but here it is! The last time I had a blog was myspace and xanga like 6 years ago..wow. I'm getting old) Dear Future me, Please, remember this time of your life. I wouldn't want you to regret it, or even worse, repeat it. Love, Past you.    Well, let me start by saying that 2013 was the best/worst year of my life. The best because I've been given opportunities to learn things about myself and my walk with God I've never learned before. The worst because I've never felt so much heartache in my life ever.    Starting January of last year I was able to finish out my associates in college (finally! I've been doing missionary work for the past 5 years and put it to the side for a while). I was able to serve in the ministry full-time. I was able to visit family for the holidays. I was engaged to a man I couldn't wait to start my life with. That June we got married! We moved up t